My heart sank,
Not because we were last but because our friend had failed!
Not possible!
It's fine Chatur.
There is a mistake! It's not possible!
This is injustice! Injustice! Oh God!
Why is this idiot Silencer shouting so much?
He has come second...
Idiot. Who's first then?
Rancho...
Rancho!? Idiot..
Move.. Move yaar
We learn something about human behavior that day.
If your friend fails, you feel sad.
But if your friend comes first, you feel even more sad!
On that day we were sad.
But there were two more people who were sadder than us.
Rancchoddas Chanchad, first row, right of the director!
Uday Sinha, second row, third seat!
Alok Mittal, second row, fifth seat! Hey!
Sir, is it compulsory to sit according to our ranks?
Why, do you have any problem?
Sir, I have problem with entire grading system itself!
It's like the caste-system sir! A grade students-kings, C grade students-slaves!
It's not nice sir!
Do you have a better idea for this?
Yes sir, I do!
Results should not be put up on a notice board
Why should we exhibit someone's weakness in front of all?
Now sir, if in your blood test, the haemoglobin count is less
will the doctor give you tonic or put up your report on the TV?
You see sir!
So basically what you're saying is I must go to each one's room one-by-one and say their results in their ears!?
You've come first, you've come second, I'm so sorry, you failed.
No sir, I didn't mean that way.
But the thing is, grades creates divide, divide.
Now see..I've come first so I'm sitting with you
Whereas my friends have come last So they are seated in the last, in a corner.
At least they are sitting in a corner now, if they continue being with you, next year they'll be out of the photo itself!
Neither will they pass nor any company will give them jobs!
Sir, they'll find a job somehow sir.
There will be at least a few companies which hire people and not machines for work!
It's not like that sir, they'll find a job.. I guarantee it.
Oh? You guarantee it? You guarantee it!?
Bet sir? Bet?
Govind.
If even one among those two get a job in the campus interviews
then shave my mustache!
OK sir!
Happy?
Happy sir!
Woahhhh!
By using the car's horn, you want to hide your horn? Idiot!
Idiot! Septic tank! You had the Churan again?
I didn't do it...
Raju!
We've been very used to this hot air from those days.
This idiot is responsible for global warming! Oh I can't take it!
Give me, give me your wallet. I'll go and buy some pants!
Leave it yaar, wear this Chatur Ramaalingam's suit pant!
Hey don't you touch my suit!
Leave it yaar, Rancho will recognize you even without the pant!
Hey Mr. where's this address?
Brother, if I was so educated would I be selling groundnuts?
He doesn't know to read.
But at least he knows to speak!
Brother, here in Simla is there any Rancchoddas Chanchad?
Yes, yes, he stays over there!
#....he was like the fleeting wind.....#.
Let's go!
#....like a fluttering kite.....#
#..... where did he go? let's find him!......#.
Oye Chatur.. Here's your bottle of Churan!
Oh thanks, where did you find it?
It was in the pocket!
Hey! How dare you! That's my pant!
Hey what's mine, what's yours? It's written in Gita!
Hey shut up! Take off the pants.
Hey what are you doing yaar!People will misinterpret! Mad! Idiot!
Hey leave.
Hey I want it now!
What happened?
Rancho's dad!
Brother, where can I find Rancchoddas?
He's sitting over there.
Thank you.
Rancho!
Yes?
Oh sorry, we wish to meet Rancchoddas.
I'm Rancchoddas, what is it?
No.. Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad.
I'm Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad... what is it?
Rancho, take care of yourself!
Rancchoddas Chanchad!
Raju!
Yaar, I must be the first man in history who traveled from Delhi to Simla in underwear that too to meet a wrong person!
Yaar, the same name, the same degree, and the same photo!
But the person is different. What's the matter? I'm unable to understand!
But from where did Silencer get Rancho's address?
Yes!
Oye chatur! Come here.
Hey! Hey!
How dare you open this! I got this from San Francisco.
It's hand-made biscuit..
Especially for Mr. Phunsukh Wangdu!
Phunsukh Bangdu? Now who is this?
Wangdu, Wangdu! 'W', 'W'! Phunsukh Wangdu!
Do you know who that is?
He's a great scientist, 400 patents, the world wants him!
I have been chasing him for the past year and the meeting has been fixed now!
You know once he signs a deal with my company, I'll be huge! Huge!
Now stop praising this Wangdu and tell us from where did you get Rancho's address?
You should be thanking Phunsukh Wangdu! It's because of him, that I found a clue.
See this, my secretary Tracey was here last month to arrange a meeting with Phunsukh Wangdu.
Tracey couldn't get an appointment with Phunsukh but I got Rancho.
I checked Simla's phone directory, in that the name was Chanchad Rancchoddas.
Then how did his appearance change? He heard you are coming and got plastic surgery done or what?
Only one man can answer this!
I'm sorry dad!
I couldn't fulfill your last wish!
You kept on saying, "take me to Haridwar, take me to Haridwar"
But I was waiting for the highway's tender to be opened.
The tender opened over there
and you closed your eyes over here!
I'm so sorry dad!
I could not be a good son!
What are you saying yaar?
You have become such a great engineer, the degree's been put up on the wall.
You are a very good son!
How dare you enter my property without my permission!
I'll put you behind bars!
You'll go behind bars, idiot!
We have investigated everything.
On the basis of your I.C.E. degree, you're taking these highway contracts and hydro projects.
This degree belongs to our friend! How did it come to you?
It's a 150 hectares property. I'll blow off your heads and bury you in a corner, nobody will get to know.
Get the point? Now get lost!
I'm taking dad's ashes and going to Haridwar. If you want, I'll even take your bones along with that!
Lift the dad!
Over there, there, there!
Leave my dad!
Tell us who you are, or else I shall immerse your dad's ashes over here itself.
Handover dad to me!
Dad's ashes won't go to the Ganga, they'll go into the gutter!
Remove dad from the pot, remove from the pot!
If you press the trigger then I'll press the flush!
See, I'll count till three, that's it!
Hey, who are you scaring? Shoot!
Raju, put it in!
One..
Hey, we'll go to hell but along with that we'll even finish your dad! Got it!?
Two..
Then strain-strain and remove your dad using a strainer!
What?
We got the wrong one, this one is empty.
Empty?
Empty! We'll empty it!
No! No!
We'll empty it, we'll empty it! I'm telling you we'll empty it!
Noooooooo! Hands up!
Come on tell, tell! Who are you?
Aare, I'm Rancchoddas yaar!
No! I swear on dad! I swear on dad, I'm telling the truth yaar!
I'm Rancchoddas, he was Chhote!
Chhote?
He was the son of our gardener.
Everyone used to call him Chhote!
Even after his mom and dad passed away, dad let him stay in the house!
He used to do odd household works, you know.
Changing bulbs, getting eggs and bread, ironing, like.
He was very much interested in studies!
He used to wear my old uniform and get into the school
Whichever class he liked, he would go and sit in that one!
I used to take advantage of that.
I used to make him do my homework also
and make him write my exam papers also.
I was having a good time!
Then one day.
Master ji saw that a 6th standard child was solving a 10th standard problem
Which class are you in, son? What's your name?
We were caught.
Dad was a big man so Master ji thought it's better to tell him before telling the principal.
You've begun this, so you will end it!
The whole Himachal salutes in front of me.
But as soon as I turn away, behind my back
they call me an illiterate!
This won't happen with my son!
He wants education, and me, just a degree.
Let it continue as it is, make this boy an engineer.
Rancchoddas Chanchad's degree, I want it over there on that wall.
I went away to London for four years and he kept studying in I.C.E. using my name.
He had a deal with my dad that after getting a degree from I.C.E.
He won't meet anyone from I.C.E. in his whole lifetime!
He usually said "I won't go meet anyone, but one day two idiots will come searching for me
"then what will you do?"
He misses you both a lot!
I'll give you the address.
Go meet him.
But don't tell my secret to anyone yaar, please!
Which secret?
Sir ji, you got the wrong urn! The master is in this.
Hey what the hell is going on?
Who was that gun man?
Aare its a very complicated story and it is without subtitles You can't understand.
Ignore it, ignore it
Where are we going?
Ladakh.
Ladakh? Why?
To meet Rancho!
Is he in Ladakh?
What is he doing over there?
Don't know, but this is a school's address!
School teacher... he he he! Master ji!
I'm vice-president of Rockledge Corporation!
And he... A for apple, B for ball!
D for donkey!
Next week, I'll be signing a multi-million dollar deal with Phunshukh Wangdu!
And he... A for apple, B for ball!
Today, my respect grew even more for that Idiot Rancho!
We all went to college only to get a degree.
If we don't have a degree, we won't have a job!
If you don't have a job, no father will give his daughter's hand.
Bank won't give credit card, and the world won't respect us.
But that idiot came to college, not for the degree but to study!
He wasn't afraid to come last or greedy to come first!
Who was the first man to step on the moon?
Neil Armstrong sir!
Obviously it's Neil Armstrong, we all know it. But who was the second man?
Don't waste your time, it's not important!
Nobody remembers the man who ever came second!
After two months, 26 companies will come to this college to offer jobs to you all!
That means before your final exams,
You'll have jobs on your hands!
This is your last act my friends!
Put the medal on the pedal, press the accelerator Go out there and make history!
Any questions?
Yes..
Sir, suppose any student gets a job and
he fails in the finals by 1-2 marks
then will the job remain or?
Very good question
is there any other person, in whose mind, the same question is arising?
As expected.
Please come on stage, everyone give them a big hand. Come on the stage, come.
Come, come, don't waste time!
For the past four years, they have been the most consistent students of I.C.E.!
Because consistently, they've come last in every exam.
Come my geniuses, come.
If we remove these two people's brains and sell them in the market, we'll get a very good price!
Because they are unused brains! They have never been used!
And to answer to their question
whether they pass or fail, it's not going to affect their jobs
because they are not going to get jobs at all!
I guarantee it.
Their names will be written in gold.
FARHANITRATE and PRERAJULISATION!
Give them a big hand please, everybody!
Idiot, he raped us completely
collective rape you know, in front of, in front of everyone!
God, I'll stop eating non-veg, I'll light thousands of incense sticks!
Do only one thing
take away Virus from this world!
Burn him in hell.
Make hot pakkodas of him in hot oil! God!
Are you giving God a contract to kill?
Idiot you sit quietly.
Idiot every year you sit in the center with VIRUS and take photos
While we'll be rotting on the side.
This year I think we'll be finished out of the photo itself!
Do you know why I come first?
Why?
Because I'm in love with machines.
Engineering is my passion, passion.
Do you know what your passion is?
Hey that's my bag.
Keep quiet man!
What are you doing, Rancho?
Hey.
This is your passion! This! This!
Go and post this letter.
But what is it?
5 years ago, he had written this letter to his favorite wild life photographer!
Andre.. Isthawa?
Yeah Isthawa.
He wanted to go to him, go to Hungary and learn, work from him!
But fearing his dad, due to Hitler Qureshi, he never posted the letter at all!
Aare, quit Engineering and become a wild life photographer!
Do that work which you are talented in!
If Lata Mangeshkar's dad would have told her to become a fast bowler
or Sachin Tendulkar's father would have told him to be a singer.
Then think, where would they stand today?
Are you understanding what I'm saying?
Idiot, he loves animals but is marrying machines!
Baba Rancchoddas.
My girlfriend and wife, both are engineering itself.
Then why do I come last, tell?
Because you are a coward.. coward.
See this, see his hand, the fingers are less and the rings are more.
One for exam, one for sister's marriage and one for job.
Aare if you are you scared of the future do you think you can live?
And what will you focus on today?
I've got weird friends yaar.
One fears and lives, and one idiot dies and lives!
Hey.
But you idiot, do both the things.
You fear also and die also.
I don't fear!
Hey listen.
He dies on Pia and fears to tell.
Go go, get lost.
It's easy to give free advice dude but difficult to follow it.
If you dare then go and tell pia! Tell.
Hey from where all are you guys connecting things?
There's full connection Baba.
Listen to me, listen to me
What I say is, if you go and tell Pia about what you're feeling.
Then even I'll go and tell my dad that I want to be a photographer and don't want to be an engineer.
Yes.
Even I'll remove all my rings and go to an interview.
Now say.
Say... do you dare?
Baba Rancchoddas rolled his tongue back. What will he say?
Come.
Come
Where, where?
Come.
Viru.
Jay has come Viru!
See, see if there's any dog!
Hey cowards, I'm not afraid of anything! Come!
Hey you guys get in. If there's any danger outside, I'll give a Virus alert!
Idiot! Virus! Old man!
Hey.
Shall I give background music?
Pia?
Sshhhhh... don't shout.
I'm Rancchoddas Chanchad.
Listen to me for 2 minutes then I'll go away
[Raju singing in the background] [Don't say anything, don't say anything at all]
Pia,
the 22 minutes that I spent with you on the scooter
those were the most beautiful 22 minutes of my life!
I can spend the rest of my life on the scooter with you
Wow!
#.......everything is still.......#.
Do you know, you come on scooter everyday wearing a bride's costume in my dreams!
Instead of the veil, you take off your helmet
and you come near me to kiss me
but that kiss won't happen yaar
Why?
Because the nose comes in between and then I wake up.
Nose doesn't come in between, stupid!
I'm sorry! I thought you were Pia.
I wish I was.
Sister, why did you interrupt in between?
He took 4 years to say this.
Pia kiss him and tell him, nose doesn't come in between!
You have my permission.
Kiss him yaar! He's so cute
Who is this?
Sister
Who are you?
Do you know, when you were speaking, he kicked for the first time!
He? How do you know if it's a he or she?
Dad had asked the astrologer.
He wanted to know, is an engineer coming home or a doctor?
That means?
That means if it's a boy, then it's an engineer and if it's a girl, then it's a doctor.
Oye champ you stay inside itself, outside there's a lot of circus!
And the circus's ringmaster, your grandfather will spin the hunter and say run!
Life is a race, run, be an engineer.
But you become whatever your heart says.
If he scares you too much.
Keep a hand on your heart and say "All iz well"!
He kicked!
Say it again "Aal iz well"!
"Aal iz well"!
Yes! He kicked! He kicked Pia!
Say "Aal iz well"!
"Aal iz well"!
Goooooooo!
You sent a letter to my dad! Take this pee-mail freely from us.
Pigeon, go go go.
Pigeon, go go go
Who is it?
Your coming son-in-law! Idiotic Virus and marriage attenders!
Rastogi!?
Security! That way, that way!
So you all have already learn about the simple pendulum.
Now let's get down to the advanced study about compound pendulum.
It's an irregular object oscillating about it's own axis.
Let me demonstrate to you
What's this?
Pencil
What's inside it?
Lead!
Good! Lead is the axis to this pencil.
Even you can be a compound pendulum if you oscillate about
Where is Raju Rastogi?
Present sir!
Hi, everybody is here.
Good morning sir
Where were you last night?
Sir, he was studying sir. He was studying for the whole night sir!
Really?
He hasn't slept for two nights, that's why he's looking like this sir!
What are you saying?
What were you studying?
Ummmm.
Induction motors sir, induction motor, he studied fully sir! Induction motor!
In that case, Mr. Raju Rastogi.
Yes sir?
Can you tell me how an induction motor starts?
Brrrrrrrrm.
Rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
brrrrrrrrrr.
Stop it!
Brrrrrrrrrrmmm brmmmmm brmm brm.
Sir.. rum!
Mr. Rastogi, let's have a cup of tea in my office.
Sir.
Close the door.
Do you know how to type?
Yes sir.
Can you type a letter for me?
Definitely sir.
Come, sit.
Sir, I'm sorry sir.
Please type.
Dear sir,
It is my painful duty to inform you that your son is restigated.
No, no sorry. Delete it, delete it, go back!
Your son Mr. Raju Rastogi.
Is restigated from the Imperial College of Engineering!
Come on, type, type, come on, go on!
Dad will die sir.
Please type.
Sir, please sir.
My decision is final and irrevocable!
He's living only in hope that he could see me become an engineer sir!
You could've thought of this before you pissed in front of my door.
Sir give me one more chance sir, please! Just one chance!
Sir, please sir!
Ok, remove your name from the letter
and put Rancchoddas Chanchad's name!
I know he was with you last night!
Be my witness and I won't remove you from the college.
You have 7.5 minutes with you to think
#......we won't let you go .......#
#.......we shall not let you leave.......#
#.......even if god might summon you.......#
#.....but we are not the one who fear him.....#
#.....we are standing here in this ground with resolve.....#
#.....take out our eyes from our pal....#
#....no matter how hard you try.....#
#....we're not gonna let you leave like this.....#
#......we won't let you go .......#
#.......we shall not let you leave.......#.
Rancho, look at that monitor.
Raju!
The body is paralyzed due to the shock
but the mind is alert
he can see us and hear us!
Please aunty, don't cry in front of him!
Talk to him normally, motivate him, crack jokes, keep him happy.
Oye Raju, we have a good news yaar.
Dad has become well yaar! That new medicine worked!
It's the Rastogi family's tradition that.
If one man gets up, the other man will lie down!
Come on, come on, get up now!
Your dad is asking for Pia's scooter?
What do you say? Shall I give it?
Won't he bang it?
Hey Raju, Farhan wants to tell you something.
On the webcam, live from the hostel!
See this, Virus has canceled your suspension, problem solved!
Come on, wake up at least now!
Everything is solved.
Oye are you listening? Hey!
Rastogi!
See this? Mom bought a new saree, new saree!
Brand new!
It costs 2000 bucks son, see?
At least get up now, idiot!
Not one, she bought ten sarees, ten!
See!?
Oye Raju!
Raju tell me, how do I look?
Hey, Kammo
have you heard about Kammo?
Aare, Kammo's marriage has been fixed
and that too without any dowry!
Hey, bridegroom, the bridegroom doesn't want Maruti 800.
Doesn't want anything, wants Kammo, only Kammo.
And do you know who the bridegroom is?
Yes?
Who's the bridegroom?
Guess it!
You know him very well!
He loves animals a lot.
And, and he's gonna be a wild life photographer!
Hey keep quiet! Keep quiet!
Didn' t flash?
Aare, it's our Farhan yaar!
As if our Farhan will take dowry from you ppl!
Aare, our Farhan will marry your sister..Farhan!
And that too, free, free, free.
Hey, hey.
Hey, hey Raju.
Raju.
If we would have given 1 kilo lady's finger and 1/2 kilo paneer freely to that idiot,
Even then he would get up
What was the need to sacrifice me?
Well done yaar, well done, well done.
Everything is fixed, your sister's marriage is fixed.
Farhan will marry, OK done!
Rancho!
Idiots, how much will you lie?
You are saved, idiot!
Did you call for a taxi?
I have called for it, it's waiting.
Thank you
Why?
I have to go for a job interview.
Oh, so you gonna go with me?
No, I'll drop you home and I'll go for the job interview!
Idiot, why will I go home?
Did you forget?
We had promised something to this idiot!
Give, give me your tie!
Why?
Give it, I don't think after reading this, you'll be able to go for the interview!
What is that?
It's a letter.
It's come for you from Hungary!
It's some photographer, Andre Isthawan!
Idiots, you posted my letter?
He liked your photos very much..he's become crazy!
He wants to make you his assistant!
He has called you to work, in the Brazilian rainforest for one year!
He's saying..he'll even give you a salary!
Dad won't oblige!
Go to him and make him understand lovingly.
Don't fear today farhan..
Otherwise after 50 years when you'll be old and fallen in the hospital
and waiting to die
you'll think then, this letter was in my hand, taxi was at the gate
if I had dared a little bit, life would have been something else!
What do you think, will he like it?
What was the need to get such an expensive one!
Today, son is getting a job.
Now the days to put our head up and roam with pride are arriving and you are being stingy!?
Aare Farhan?
Farhan, today was your interview, right?
I didn't go.
I don't wanna be an engineer dad!
What happened, you had an accident?
Sir, umm...
that building in front sir.
I had jumped off its third floor sir
Why?
Because I was restigated
Why?
Sir I had pissed on director's door when I was drunk.
That devil Rancho is still playing with your brain?
I can't understand engineering, even if I'll be an engineer, I'll be a very bad engineer dad!
Rancho tells a very simple thing
Whatever you enjoy doing, make that your profession!
Then work won't seem to be work, but a game!
Aare..how much will you earn in that jungle?
Dad, stipend isn't too much but I'll get to learn a lot!
After 5 years, when you'll see your friends buying a car.
Then you'll curse yourself!
I'll be frustrated being an engineer,
then I'll curse you throughout my life!
Dad, it's better I curse myself, right?
Aare..people will laugh!
They'll say that you came till final year and had quit!
That Kapoor sir told me that you're lucky that your son is studying in I.C.E.!
What will he think?
Kapoor sir didn't get AC fixed in my room!
Making me sleep comfortably, he himself didn't sleep in the heat!
Making me sit on his shoulders, Kapoor sir didn't take me around the zoo!
You did all that dad!
What you think, makes a difference!
What Kapoor sir thinks, it doesn't make a difference to me!
Aare, I don't even know his first name!
Have you watched a film and come, are you performing drama?
Stop it now, poor guy is tensed!
God forbid, if he does something like Raju!
Then the discussion is only over!
Don't say anything to your son or else he'll jump from the terrace!
No dad, I won't commit suicide.
I promise!
That Rancho
Whom you call a devil.
He forcibly made me put yours and mom's photo in this!
He started saying that promise me that whenever such stupid thoughts come to your mind
see this photo and think what will happen to this smile when they see your dead body!
Dad, I want to convince you!
But not by hanging this suicide's sword on your head!
What will happen?
If I become a photographer, then I'll earn less right? Home will be small, car will be small!
But dad, I'll be happy.
I will be really happy!
Whatever I do for you, I'll do it from my heart!
Till today I have listened to whatever you said. Today, just once, let me listen to my heart!
Please dad!
Dad, don't go, please!
Return this one.
Son, how much will your professional camera cost?
Will we get it against this laptop?
If it costs more money, then ask me son.
Go, go son, live your life.
Your marks are consistently poor, is there any particular reason?
It was due to fear. I was a bright student since childhood.
My parents thought that I would abolish our poverty!
I started to fear!
When I came here, I saw that there's a race, if you don't come first, no one will recognize you.
I started to fear even more!
Fear is not good for grades, sir!
I started wearing more rings, praying more
not only praying, I started begging God
"give me this, give me that!"
16 bones broke, I got two months to think, then I understood!
Sir, today I haven't told God to get me this job.
I just folded my hands and said thank you for this life.
If you guys, if you guys even reject me today, then I don't have any regrets.
Because I believe I'll somehow do something worthy with my life sir!
See this very much frank behaviour of yours is not good for our company
We need a diplomatic person to handle the clients
and you are way too straightforward!
But if you assure us that you can control this attitude of yours.
Then, something can happen.
Sure.
After breaking both limbs, I learnt to stand on my feet sir,
with great difficulty, I got this attitude in me! It can't happen sir!
You keep your job, I'll keep my attitude.
I'm sorry, don't mind sir.
Stop.
I've been recruiting for the past 25 years, I've conducted a lot of interviews
to get the job, people find "yes" in our "yes" itself!
From where have you come yaar?
Sir, I?
How much salary will you take brother? Let's discuss.
Thank you sir.
Thank you.
Oh emperor
you are great
accept out gift.
Govind!!!!!
Sir you only told if they get job, remove your moustache
What have you done?
I'm feeling like someone undressed me
humiliated me.
I won't let you conquer, Rastogi.
You're gonna get job only when you pass the final exams
but this time I'm gonna set the paper for the exam.
Dad.
That's not fair.
Everything is fair in love and war
and this is World War 3.
Rastogi you're gone this time
What are you doing here?
Easy, easy.
You're drunk?
Yeah yaar, had to take two, four
two, four?
Two or four?
I was in need of boldness.
For what?
To steal this
What is this?
A duplicate key of Virus's office.
Question papers are in the red sealed envelope.
Dad has set by himself
to fail Raju in the exam.
Take it out.
Are you mad or what?
This is cheating yaar, no.
Everything is fair in love and war.
Ok, just tell me one thing.
Do you really feel
nose comes in between if you wanted to kiss?
Hmmm.
Hey have this dhokla, hold this,
You Gujrati people are too cute yaar, but why does your food sound so dangerous?
Dhokla, phaphda, handhwa, thepla, kakkrah.
It seems as though they are some missiles!
Come, come on.
Tonight bush dropped two dhoklas; 400 killed, 200 injured!
Come on.
Aare.
I can bear with khakrah, phaphda.
But this name of your's.
Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad
yuck!
I won't change my surname after marriage, huh?
Pia, we can't get married
Why?
Do you love someone?
No.
Are you a gay?
No.
Then why don't you propose to me?
Are you impotent?
Then prove it, prove it.
Pia, I'm not.
Hey, stop, stop, stop, stop!
Aare, what happened?
Aare, we haven't informed Pia at all!
Oh stop now, my bladder's bursting!
Oh shut up yaar!
Are you in touch with her?
No yaar.
But I have her landline number.
Then dial it, I'll stop.
Yeah stop, stop, stop.
Hello!
No place to piss in this country?
Hello, yeah is Pia there?
She's not there sir.
Ok where will she be available? In the hospital?
Sir, why will she go to hospital today? It's her marriage today!
She's gone to Manali!
Pia marriage is over!
It's not yet over, see, it's 6 hours away! If we speed up, then we'll surely reach before the marriage vows!
What do you say?
Now if you have already thought about it partner, then take a U-turn!
No U-turn! Straight to Ladakh, we'll meet Rancho and come back..
Friday, I have a meeting with Phunsukh Wangdu.
Come, come, sit in the car.
If I miss it, you know what will happen!
The Japanese will get in.
They are offering him a first name in the company.
Phunshuk and Fujiashi, profit hearings are.
Pia weds Suhas!?
And thanks for the suit!
Yaar Virus will suffer a heart attack.
Hello, hello
Whenever his daughters are getting married, we come off to ruin it!
Ok listen, I'll handle Pia, you pull out the price tag!
Farhan!
We found Rancho, Pia!
Is it for 107?
Yes sir!
Give it here.
How much time do you take yaar?
Sorry sir.
Come on, go.
House keeping, sir!
Come in!
More, more, amore.
Quick, quick, iron my Sherwani!
More, more, amore.
Aare, we found Rancho, still, will you marry this donkey?
You're mad, Farhan!
Don't fool yourself Pia!
You love Rancho even today, and eating these dhoklas remembering him!
More, more, amore.
He's a dog's tail, put it inside a pipe for 12 years, when you remove it, it'll still remain bent!
Shut up Farhan! Suhas is a changed man!
Now he never talks about brands and prices!
My 1.5 lakh Sherwani!
Why do you people eat chutney?
Sir I'll do something sir!
What, what will you do?
Sir, sir, we get such shirts and sherwanis everyday in our laundry sir!
I'll clean it within 2 minutes sir!
Sir, one minute sir!
Get it soon!
But it's too late now, Farhan!
Pia, Pia, come, it's getting late! Come on.
Pia, I'm Raju, don't shout, people will kill me
Where is Suhas?
Aare, he had come from house-keeping, he took away the sherwani!
Go inside and send Suhas.
The hymns are going on Pia, if I get up and go then everyone will be furious yaar!
Yes farhan, tell me.
Car is ready at the gate.
I'm saying, take Pia and run!
Aare don't move yaar.
Sir?
Sherwani?
You are here?
Yes
Who's taking the vows over there?
Vows?
If the vows get over, then our marriage will be over, I'm already married Pia! Let's go!
There are so many people over here, all of them will laugh!
Aare, because people laugh, so will you suicide?
Aare..Rastogi!?
Pia, people will gossip for two days and forget it!
But today if you complete this marriage, you never forget that car was at the gate!
We had come to take you to Rancho, but only because you feared from people.
You got married to this donkey!
House keeping?
Yaar Pia, there is a small, minor problem
What?
We don't know if Rancho's married or not
What!?
Aare, it wouldn't have happened yaar, it wouldn't have happened!
And if it would've happened?
Then we'll drop you back!
Aare, don't get angry, have this biscuit.
Hand made biscuit from San Francisco.
Idiot.
From where did he come?
Ignore it, ignore it.
You eat the biscuits, eat.
It's very good
"Aal iz well, aal iz well"!
Till yesterday I was a noble citizen of this country.
But in the last 24 hours, I had got an emergency landing of a plane
almost immersed Shyamaldas's soul in the gutter
and kidnapped a bride from her wedding
all for that idiot Rancho
but even that idiot gave out his heart for his friends
he had entered Ravan's territory, to steal a question paper for Raju
search for a red sealed envelope.
OK come.
He was very afraid, that if Raju failed, he'll again go and do a high jump!
But even we were very principled robbers!
We had sworn that we'd steal the paper only for Raju, we won't even see it ourselves!
Aare yaar, where has he hidden it?
Aare yaar, searching like this, it'll be good morning.
Rancho, ask Pia
Where are you, since then I'm calling you?
Pia, your phone.
Give it to me, one minute Pia, Pia.
Jiju, when we say "Aal iz well", it kicks!
It kicked!
You heard?
Pia, your phone
We got it, Rancho.
Hello?
Aare at least call me sometimes!
Make a copy, make a xerox copy, quick!
Take it.
Put it wherever we got it from.
Carefully!
Oye where have you been, huh?
Take this
What is it?
Enjoy.
Question paper.
Virus had set it by himself to make you fail the exam
Weird friends I've got
teaching how to live straight forward first
then making me do things that are odd
no, today
if I pass, it'll be on my own ability!
Otherwise it's OK if I fail!
Idiot!
Idiot won my heart! My heart said I'll make this idiot my brother-in-law.
Umm, umm, then I controlled my emotion!
Go, go.
No sir, no sir please..
You had come to change the system!
You'll piss on my door.
Bloody rascals.
Sorry sir.
You are restigated, if you aren't gone by morning, I'll call the police.
I'll call the police!
Rascals! Rascals all of you!
How did he get my office key?
I gave him the keys dad.
I wish I had given it to my brother.
He would have been alive today.
Stop it Pia
What do you think? Brother fell off the train and died?
Shut up Pia!
You decided that he'll be an engineer.
Did you ever ask him what he wanted to be?
How much you pressurized brother, dad.
He thought it was easier to die than to give an entrance exam!
What is she saying?
Dad, you go into the room!
You get into your room!
Pia stop it, what are you doing Pia! I'm telling you right.
Brother wanted to study literature, he wanted to be a writer.
But he couldn't write anything more than this suicide note!
Pia, hide that letter, please!
Till when will I hide it sister?
Once.
Only once if you would have told him.
If you can do engineering then quit it!
Do whatever you like!
Then today brother would have been alive, dad!
He cannot suicide.
You're right dad, it wasn't a suicide.
It was a murder!
In many areas, the roads are immersed in water, there is total traffic jam!
Dad,
Dad!
Mona.
Aare, I told you to go back right? Then why are you coming behind us?
Why, is this your mom's road?
Please help, we are desperate here! Is there only one ambulance in the city?
Get an ambulance from some other hospital!
The whole city is immersed in water, sir
We can't do anything!
No..Pia..that..
Hey Mona, what happened?
Rancho, pia!
Rancho, it's impossible to reach over here, so do as I say!
You guys are not understanding! Get water bags, drive fast! You're not under...
They disconnected!
Monaa!
Be careful, be careful.
Turn on the light, turn on the light!
Table, table, table-tennis table.
Raju, switch on the webcam!
Yaa.
Ya Pia.
Hello Raju, where is sister? Show me!
Yeah..hold on, hold on
don't worry.. hold on.
See this Pia?
Sister, everything will be alright! I'm near you, OK?
Pia I'm dying.
Rancho, when there were no hospitals and doctors in this world even then babies were born.
You guys will carry on sister's delivery
"Aal iz well, aal iz well"
How dare you!?
What are you guys doing?
Dad, don't come in between! Please stay out of this, OK!?
Farhan, you go get towels and scissors.
Millimeter, get cloth, drying clip, and hot water.
Rancho you cover sister.
Sister, push.
Push, push, come on.
Push.
Keep quiet, I'm unable to push.
Rancho, see if crowning is happening?
Crowning means?
Go get that diagram.
Rancho, see if the head is coming out.
Come on Rancho, quickly.
Gooooooo.
Go, go, go, go Rancho! Go, come on!
No, no crowning. It's not coming, no.
Sister, please push!
Mona.
She's tired Pia
Wake her up.
If she doesn't push, then it'll be a big problem.
Vacuum cup has to be put, Pia
from where will they get a vacuum cup over there?
What is a vacuum cup? How does it look? What do they do with it?
I'll show you.
If the mother gets tired and is unable to push then this cup is put on the baby's head
the suction pump creates vacuum and this cup sticks on the baby's head
then the baby is pulled out.
I can make this... I can make it!
How?
Vacuum cleaner sir.
Vacuum cleaner?..
Yes sir, vacuum cleaner.
But vacuum cleaner's pressure is too much Rancho.
I'll control the pressure.
Is there a vacuum cleaner over there?
It's there in my office.
Farhan go soon and get it from sir's office.
Take the key.
Mona, push Mona, come on push!
What happened?
Yeah Pia.
Hello, Raju what happened?
The light is gone Pia.
Oh god! Now how will the vacuum cleaner work?
Farhan, you get the vacuum cleaner and I'll get the light.
How?
Millimeter, get virus out, fast come on.
Come Virus, get out, get out.
Aare not this Virus yaar, my Virus, the inverter that I had made.
That?
Go get that quickly.
Oh OK, that one, I understand!
Raju, wake everyone in the hostel.
And tell them that we want car battery, wires, tool kit and vacuum gage, come on!
Come out, there's an emergency in the common room
Where is Rancho?
Sir, sir, sir, here sir.
Everyone keep the batteries over here, come on, quickly!
And the wires.
Raju, turn off all switches and connect this inverter to the mains.
Take this.
Rancho, vacuum cleaner.
Farhan, that camera cleaning thing, what do you call it?
Plower, plower, go and get it quickly.
Rancho, take this plower.
Pull the vacuum and put it on the pipe, over here!
Rancho, it's done!
Are all the switches off?
Now turn on only the table tennis table's and computer's light on!
Raju, turn on the computer, fast!
Help me, connect this, put it in this!
Pia, come quick, Pia, come quick.
Love you Rancho.
Farhan, turn it on!
Yes!
Pia, how much must the suction be?
Not more than 0.5 Rancho.
Farhan, 0.5.
Cover up.
Yes
0.5
Ok.
Delivery using vacuum cleaner, I haven't seen this in 20 years of my career!
Farhan, off it..
Yeah.
Raju, get on the table, see me.
Push the baby down like this, like this!
Farhan, turn it on.
Come on sister, push, you can do it!
Come on Mona, push, come on!
Think about "Champ", for "Champ", come on!
Come on Mona, Mona push!
It's coming, it's coming!
Come on sister, you can do it!
Farhan, turn it off.
Yeah yeah, I turned it off.
Put two clips and cut the umbilical chord.
Farhan, get two clips fast!
Put it on the umbilical chord and get scissors.
Careful, careful.
Get the towel, towel.
Pia, Pia why isn't it crying?
Hey.
Hey "Champ"
Rancho rub its back.
Hey "Champ"
No, nothing is happening.
Blow air into its mouth.
Come on.
Come on "Champ"
Nothing is happening.
Quiet Mona, quiet.
Say "All iz well", say "aal iz well"
It kicked!
What!?
It kicked!
Say "All iz well, aal iz well"
"aal iz well"
Yeah!
At that time if Virus would have told that his grandson would have been an engineer... I would have raped that idiot!
But when that idiot opened his mouth, then a miracle happened!
Solid you kick, will you become a footballer or what?
Become, become whatever your heart says.
Stop! Where are you going?
I'm not finished with you...
On the first day of college, you had asked me a question, remember?
That why don't they use a pencil in space?
If the tip of the pencil breaks in space, then it will be revolving under the action of gravity.
It can get into someone's eyes, it can get into someone's nose.
It can get into the instrument panel.
You were wrong! You were wrong!
You cannot be right all the time!
You understand?
Yes sir.
This was a very important invention, you understand?
Yes sir.
My director had told me
when any extraordinary student comes.
Go, go, go...go study... Pass the exams and go away from here.
And now student of the year: Rancchoddas Shyamaldas Chanchad.
Sir, one photo sir!
I wanted to capture all these memories in my camera and take it with me!
On that day, everyone was hugging each other, getting emotional and making promises.
That we'll stay in touch, we'll surely meet up once in a year!
Who knew that we were seeing Rancho for the last time?
Yaar, untie him!
I'll sue you all in American court!
Raju.
This kinda school can only can be made by that idiot Rancho!
But where is he?
See there.
Go in creatures, go.
Don't piss over here!
You want a beating, huh?
Ha ha ha
We got him! That idiot is somewhere around, come on!
Brother, where will we find Rancchoddas?
Is his name Rancchoddas!?
Rancho.
Chhote, chhote... chhote.
Aare, what's his name ultimately?
Aare, cool down, cool down.
Come with me
Where, where is Rancho?
Rancho, Rancho...
Farhan, do you know, he has read every book written by you! See this.
Raju, he reads your blog everyday!
He tells the children about your research very proudly!
Do you remember your helmet sister Pia?
It was stolen right?
Who are you? And how do you remember all our names?
Didn't you recognize me?
No.
How will you recognize, now that millimeter has become centimeter!
Oye oye oye! Idiot! What centimeter, you have become kilometer!
But what are you doing over here?
For the first time, I got a letter with my name on it. I found a train ticket in that
it was written inside that if you wanna study then board the train! And I boarded it.
Idiot Rancho
Where is that idiot?
Furjee, take this and go!
You come in my dreams everyday on a scooter wearing a bride's costume!
Instead of the veil, you take off your helmet!
And you come near me to kiss me!
Aaaah... ouch!
Couldn't you tell us and go?
Umm... no...
Umm... sorry.
Did you get married?
What?.. What?...
No.. You?
Almost, idiot!
Then?
Then what?
Do you love someone?
Hmm..
Yeah
Who?
You...!
Did you see, the nose doesn't come in between, stupid!
Yes, that's right!
Idiot Rancho!
Hi, Farhan!
Aare keep your hi to yourself!
Aare listen to me!
No, you listen to me.
Aare.. you listen to me... listen to me!
No, you listen to me, I'll explain everything.
Hey Raju.
Idiot!
Look here.
Aeee idiot.
Hit him, hit him, two-three from my side as well.
Because of you, what all I had to become.. you know?
This idiot got glasses!
Come.. get up idiot.. get up.
Hey idiot!
Having fun idiots?
Hey.. hi Chatur.
Rancchoddas Chanchad.
Namaste Masterji
Where have you reached? You have become a teacher in the village, eh?
A for apple, B for ball
We boarded the bus together right.
But your train went away in reverse.
Straight to primary teacher from engineering.
Ha ha ha ha
what's the salary Chanchad? Tell me 5000 rupees, huh?
For me, that's like 100 dollars.
My son's pocket money is more than your salary!
Hey stop this nonsense.
He used to do nonsense, he wanted to change the education system.
He wanted to change the world.
Now he changes childrens' diapers over here!
Will you break his teeth or shall I break it? Idiot.
Hey let it be!
Do you remember, I had told you.
One day you'll cry and I'll laugh.
Sign over here, accept it, that you lost and I won!
The declaration of defeat, unbelievable yaar, Chatur, unbelievable!
Hey, that is Virus' pen?
How did you get it? You stole it?
Umm.. now what shall I say yaar?
This is for winners..not losers!
No problem, if you have any difficulty in school and need a donation
call my assistant, eh!
A for apple, B for ball.
He hasn't changed at all yaar.
Yaar ignore it, ignore it!
Leave him yaar, he'll keep saying anything.
Leave it, the good news is your name is not Rancchoddas Chanchad.
Imagine after marriage I would be Pia Chanchad!
Yuck!
By the way, what's your real name?
Phunshukh Wangdu
Wangdu?
Pia Wangdu?
No.. that means you are a scientist?
That means you have 400 patents in your name?
I won't change my surname after marriage.
That means you are Chatur's Wangdu?
Are the Japanese looking for you?
I don't like wangdu! I think so...
Yaar tell me one thing, are you a scientist or a teacher?
I'm a scientist but I also teach children.
That means you are THE Phunshukh Wangdu?
Yes man, yes.
Oye Silencer! Hey Chathur come back!
Stop, stop, stop.
Take van, huh?
He won't stop that way! I'll stop him!
Mr. Wangdu, I can't believe you called!
I'm sorry Mr. Chatur but I can't sign a deal with your company!
What sir, what happened sir?
Aare how shall I sign yaar.. you took away my pen!
What pen sir? I didn't get you.
The one that's in your hand, Virus' pen!
Virus' pen?
Mr. Wangdu?
Ya tell me Chatur!
A for Apple, B for Ball, L for Lucky!
Yaar, he has been raped!
You got me.
You got me Rancho.
I mean Mr. Wangdu! Totally flowed me! Good one!
I hope our personal problems are not going to affect our deal.
Hey Chatur, over here, here.
I was just joking yaar, I knew it from within that you'll do something in life!
No.., you're lying?
No, no, no, no.. I'm telling you, I swear!
Rancho 100, Chatur zero!
You win, I lose. You don't believe me?
Aare yaar!
Oh emperor, you are great Accept the gift.
I'll give you a free advice Mr. Wangdu... run!
Run, run.
Hey rancho, I'll lose my job yaar, I have small kids.
Baba Rancchoddas used to say rightly.
Kids, be self-efficient, self-efficient.
Then success will come follow you